Help Yourself

by Elias and the Error

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credits

released April 16, 2013

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Elias and the Error Akron, Ohio

Elias and the Error is an art collective from Ohio. Elias Vier composes, performs, and produces the songs, and a community of artists called The Error produces videos, artwork, costumes, and photography to make a complete audio-visual experience. Elias and the Error have toured with Powerman 5000, Polysics, Mushroomhead, Diamond Rings, Gil Mantera's Party Dream, and Zim Zum (of Marilyn Manson.) ... more

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Track Name: As I Was Going to St. Clair
As I was going to St. Clair
You stopped the car and left me there
As you drove down on Wagner Street
You thought you'd seen the last of me

She said,
"Hello, sir. You don't seem ill
And here's some forms for you to fill
I'll look them over once you're done
It says right here that you can't sleep
And they're afraid you've cut too deep
We'll do our best to cure your sunken mind"

Terrified

When they made me remove my clothes
They wouldn't let me be alone
They locked the door and locked me in
As if I wasn't panicked then

She said,
"Clean those wounds and they will heal
And here's a paper for some pills
I'm sure that you will be just fine
Dose yourself then straight to bed
The guilty dreams will fill your head
You won't want to sleep at night again"

Now I know I've got to lie
To have a chance just to survive
Upset you to return so soon
But I couldn't stay in that hospital room
Track Name: Utik
So you thought I could be bought
Your support is a souvenir coin
Show me the gang I long to join
Who am I and tell me why
I would assume you're no ally
You heard a lie and wrote it down

You have said my name so I appear
Provoking accusations that I hear

"The you that I know"
You don't know me

Watch your back and watch your mouth
It's nights like these my teeth need glue
They rattle like pills when they're shaking loose
How you feel and how you deal
Are not subject to their ideals
There is no soul that you owe pain
Track Name: Gelobtes Land
I have grown so tired of this shell, my hell
"You will trust this visitor, I bet." "Not yet."

So come to me, I need you now
I want to nest inside your black hole
Let down your guard and let it go
I want to be human

I'm so scared please hold my hand
Jingling keys to the promised land
I don't know you, but I need you

Your love's nest is featureless at best, I guess
Postured is the pyre we ignite, tonight

Empty my bags, we'll cast away
All the heirlooms that reject convention
I won't defy this Stepford life
No need to be human

I'll give you everything of mine if you never leave my side
(Please never leave)
I'll be a vessel for your wish, I'll be your victim and your bitch
I'll adapt my course to taste, give you all my time to waste
Never been in love, it crawled from your face
Remaining in my body, the rest is erased
Track Name: Satic Onanism
The climate confirms what the author undressed
The planet has nourished human loneliness
Birth order dictates desultory plight
Everybody's waiting for the next flight

Between us the unseen is straining to speak
You've sundered the union and counted the weeks
Dead bedroom stage, I admit I was there
Now you've got a cover for the knife scare

The more you resist the harder I get

The terms you've declared seem to favor my flight
Reducing your burden on Saturday night
Fictitious friends will be left in the dark
I will bring the dynamite if you play the spark

Design your disguise from my brittle skin
This is not my destiny, it's not a war that you can win
Fashion your face but we'll always be twins
This is not the end of me, this is the point where I begin
Martyr me, the savior you sell
I am not the devil but I can give you hell
Track Name: Let the Music Go
You're right, it's time to grow up and start my life
I know, you're right, I'll grow up, it's time

They will love me once I change
I will make them proud
All my friends are done with school
Dreams are just for sleep

I will let the music go
I won't play another show

I got a letter from a girl named Jessica
She said my songs had saved her life
At the club was Chris with a Sharpie and a disc
He asked when the next would be out

You're the ones who understand
I won't let you down
Through the failures, we believe
In this song we share

I can't let the music go
I will play a thousand shows
Track Name: Invective Vows Implied Consent
Most nights I dream about you dead
I want to set fire to all our things
How can you smother your own urge?
I wish I'd never tried to integrate you

I want to make you pay for all the soul I lent you
I want you to confess your life is safely soulless
You've subdued your desire and everybody knows
You think you're concealed but in your voice it shows

Oh no, in your voice it shows
(The worst thing you could be is somebody is love with me?)
You hate yourself, oh no, and in your voice it shows

Let us go back to the hotel
I never knew that I could feel so tended
Who knew one day I would wake up
In a world that can retract its fortunes?

I want you to admit you're so ashamed of yourself
I know I'm one to talk, at least I try to own it
You've siphoned my empathy and I want you exposed
You think you're clean but in your heart you know

Oh no, in your heart you know
(The thing you're running from is something we are all made of)
You're one of us, oh no, and in your heart you know

I can retreat no further
As far as history goes, I am dead
But I have found God and he is insufficient

All we do is abuse each other
Where do you think he learned it, mother?
Where do you think I learned it, mother?

Bloodless mutilation pierces bone and marrow
My assimilation, tormentor fed infernos

Look into my eyes and say "Why don't you cum like a good boy?"
Spit in your hand and make me cum like a good boy
You freaked out when I found a tissue you masturbated into
I took comfort in knowing I wasn't the only thing you came into
Crumpled up and threw in the trash
Track Name: Zero-Son, the Mercurial
Hello friend, did you know there's a ghost present, and if not
You know now, 'cause through my feet you see the ground
Goodbye friend, and since I'll never call again, you found out
There is no me and we can't have that happen, can we?

Who the fuck do you think you are?
Why should it concern you?
Who the fuck do you think you are?
I've got not fucking clue!

Maybe I'm a girl 'cause today I'll be a bitch
Maybe I don't give a shit, it ain't that hard to switch
Maybe I'm a tree or just a fucking shrub
Maybe I'll be just like you or none of the above

Hello love, did you know that we're far too young
For these types of habits
But we can still pretend we're rabbits
Goodbye love, I'm not the one your heart's set on and with that
Your pain lifts, it manifests upon my wrists

Maybe I'm in Stockholm 'cause I've been captive for years
Maybe I'm a child with a past due bill of fears
Maybe I'm a genius and this wicked world's depraved
Maybe I'm an atom bomb and all of you should pray
Track Name: Good Morning, Master
Good morning, master, what will it be today?
Good morning, master, what will it be from me, your slave?
Good morning, master, what can I do for you?
Good morning, master, what can I do if you're untrue?
Track Name: Depraved Indifference
I slipped God my number, but he did not call
No silent receiver is breaking this fall
Oh, and I smile as I shatter

I'm alive and well and well that's it

Acedia's muzzle has swallowed me whole
I seek the condition you seem to extol
I don't trust the money, so where did it go?
The cuts are strategic so you'll never know

I am looking for a fix, anything that does it quick
Fatal mechanisms to evade responsibility
I am searching for my worth, my intentions never work
Futile ceremonies to acknowledge objectivity
Track Name: Help Yourself
So help yourself
Take what you need
Why is nobody helping me?
Am I the only one here?

I have no help, why am I so helpless?
I have no love, am I unlovable?
I have no hope, why am I so hopeless?
I have no life and it won't end today

Will I let you have your way?
When I do the ghost will say

I am so smart, how did I end up here?
I am too young to house this hurt and hate
I am so kind, why did I come back here?
I am too brave, the guilt manipulates

Pin a medal to a bleeding chest
Dress it up, you did your best
I won't wither where you wish I stayed
This is how a warrior's made
Track Name: Unfamiliar Optimistic View
Who we are, we're the ones that they said were not right
Who we are, we're the ones who've gathered here tonight
Who we are, we're the exiles of the town
Who we are, we're the flame that melts it down

It never ends, me and my friends
Drinking wine and rarely making sense
If I've got you to see me through
Unfamiliar optimistic view

Let it go, all our pennies in the well
Let it go, all our destinies in Hell
Let it go, all our value they can't see
Let it go, all those people we don't need

The secret, I've found, is never give up
Always be firm, don't give a fuck
All that we need is not what they say
They ought to know since they made us this way